Entry tags:
The Trappings of Wealth
We went out to dinner for my grandfather's 90th birthday today. We got dinner at a Bonefish Grill, the food was excellent and a good time was had by all.
Well, mostly a good time. There were a couple moments where I was uncomfortable. Not because of anything that happened, but because of the place. The Bonefish Grill is a relatively fancy place and expensive place. Not the kind of place that rich people go, but the kind of place designed to feel fancy and expensive while still being within the price range of middle and upper-middle class people. What made me uncomfortable though, were the servers. They were dressed in those weird chef shirts with the big flap across that buttons down the one side, and had obviously been taught all the stuff about how to present wine and so on. They felt too much like servants. Especially since I could tell they were just regular people, including a bunch who were obviously college students, like people I'm around every day.
I'm not comfortable around the trappings of wealth. And servants are one of the most blatant trappings of wealth. Servants just feel wrong. I guess it's kinda weird since I don't really have problems with the servers at other places, but there it's just somebody doing a crappy job for tips. Which it is at Bonefish, I'm sure, but there they're required to pretend more, and the tips are (normally) better. But that same appearance of wealth that is a lot of what you pay for somewhere like that is what made me uncomfortable.
It's not just servants, though. Other things do too. Mostly things in the sense of physical things like one would buy. I don't object to nice stuff, but nice stuff, to me, is stuff that does what it's supposed to do well. Looking nice is a bonus, but it's designed to be used and if it gets used, it's going to get worn and nicked and stuff like that. And that I don't have any problem with. In fact, a while back, I realized it's better in almost every way to spend more for the thing that will work and hold up better than to spend less on the cheap thing that'll break and need to be replaced soon. It's cheaper in the long run, and you get better use out of it. But stuff that's fancy just for the sake of fancy makes me uncomfortable. Things that are too nice to be used for their intended purpose. Sometimes, I'm afraid I'd break them, sometimes it's just the ostentatious display of something that's fancier just to show how fancy and expensive it is, and sometimes it's because I feel like breaking the pointlessly fancy things because they're pointlessly fancy.
I think the fundamental thing here is difference. Servants, pointlessly fancy gear, those are the standard trappings of aristocracy. And the fundamental claim of aristocracy is the aristocrats are different than everybody else. Better than everybody else. And that's completely wrong, and completely against most of the fundamental things I believe.
Now, the thing is, I know this is dumb. Wealth has been at least partially decoupled from the whole idea of aristocracy. That's a good thing. And any trappings of wealth that can be bought for the price of an expensive meal aren't that much about wealth. But it's not even that. The trappings of wealth are just that, trappings. They're just surface things, and getting distracted by the surface things is dumb.
But that still doesn't mean I'm comfortable with that kind of stuff, because that's not the kind of stuff I want. And that I guess, makes sense. If it's not something I want, why should I be happy to get it?
Well, mostly a good time. There were a couple moments where I was uncomfortable. Not because of anything that happened, but because of the place. The Bonefish Grill is a relatively fancy place and expensive place. Not the kind of place that rich people go, but the kind of place designed to feel fancy and expensive while still being within the price range of middle and upper-middle class people. What made me uncomfortable though, were the servers. They were dressed in those weird chef shirts with the big flap across that buttons down the one side, and had obviously been taught all the stuff about how to present wine and so on. They felt too much like servants. Especially since I could tell they were just regular people, including a bunch who were obviously college students, like people I'm around every day.
I'm not comfortable around the trappings of wealth. And servants are one of the most blatant trappings of wealth. Servants just feel wrong. I guess it's kinda weird since I don't really have problems with the servers at other places, but there it's just somebody doing a crappy job for tips. Which it is at Bonefish, I'm sure, but there they're required to pretend more, and the tips are (normally) better. But that same appearance of wealth that is a lot of what you pay for somewhere like that is what made me uncomfortable.
It's not just servants, though. Other things do too. Mostly things in the sense of physical things like one would buy. I don't object to nice stuff, but nice stuff, to me, is stuff that does what it's supposed to do well. Looking nice is a bonus, but it's designed to be used and if it gets used, it's going to get worn and nicked and stuff like that. And that I don't have any problem with. In fact, a while back, I realized it's better in almost every way to spend more for the thing that will work and hold up better than to spend less on the cheap thing that'll break and need to be replaced soon. It's cheaper in the long run, and you get better use out of it. But stuff that's fancy just for the sake of fancy makes me uncomfortable. Things that are too nice to be used for their intended purpose. Sometimes, I'm afraid I'd break them, sometimes it's just the ostentatious display of something that's fancier just to show how fancy and expensive it is, and sometimes it's because I feel like breaking the pointlessly fancy things because they're pointlessly fancy.
I think the fundamental thing here is difference. Servants, pointlessly fancy gear, those are the standard trappings of aristocracy. And the fundamental claim of aristocracy is the aristocrats are different than everybody else. Better than everybody else. And that's completely wrong, and completely against most of the fundamental things I believe.
Now, the thing is, I know this is dumb. Wealth has been at least partially decoupled from the whole idea of aristocracy. That's a good thing. And any trappings of wealth that can be bought for the price of an expensive meal aren't that much about wealth. But it's not even that. The trappings of wealth are just that, trappings. They're just surface things, and getting distracted by the surface things is dumb.
But that still doesn't mean I'm comfortable with that kind of stuff, because that's not the kind of stuff I want. And that I guess, makes sense. If it's not something I want, why should I be happy to get it?
no subject
"Especially since I could tell that a bunch of them were just regular people, college students and the like."
Wait, who's NOT regular people?
no subject
I see what it is, the "bunch of them" phrase is in the wrong place.
no subject
When you get right down to it, the purpose of wealth is to spend it, as holding onto it does you no good. At the same time, it also isn't a good idea to squander wealth, as it does nothing for you.
It really doesn't take all that much money to live eloquently. I think when people get more money than they need, they feel compelled to use it on the needless trappings you described. It becomes a cross of using it because it's there and vanity.