The Platonic Ideal of a Gift

[forsyth]

In the aftermath of much frenzied shopping nationwide and the subsequent giving (and inevitable returning) of many of these gifts, I figured I'd try and narrow down what makes a good gift. I have a theory.

The ideal gift is something the person you're getting it for needs and wants, but wouldn't buy for themself. Ideally, it's something they've never even heard of until they get it.

Obviously, ideal gifts don't happen often. It requires knowing somebody well (or a great deal of dumb luck), plus another dose of dumb luck by running across that exact thing. And the knowledge to recognize it, and the ability to acquire it. But any good gift is going to share some of those factors.

The most important is certainly the person needing and/or wanting it. If they don't want or need it, they're not going to get any benefit from it, and probably would just end up returning it. That's why people make gift lists, and it tends to work fairly well. But unless it's a truly expansive gift list, it narrows down the options a lot and removes much of the surprise from gift getting. Which is part of the fun. And it takes away the recognition of "wow, this person really knows the kinds of things I like."

And it should be something they won't buy for themselves, because otherwise they might already have gone and bought it. And that's no good. But even if they haven't already gone and bought it, they would have eventually. Probably. So if they haven't, either they're holding off on buying things, thanks to imminent gift-giving, or they don't really want it that badly. Or it's too expensive for them. So while it'd still be appreciated, it's not so much of a surprise, and it's not THAT important to them, usually.

Something new isn't really that important, but it adds to the surprise value and the knowledge of the person parts of gift giving. Think of it like frosting. Cake is acceptable without it, and by itself it's not that great, but by their powers combined...

Personally, I'm a big fan of utility of presents too, because something that makes itself useful and does something is usually better than something that just looks pretty. Looking pretty is doing something, yes, and is important, but too much just pretty stuff and it goes from stuff to crap and clutter and that's no help to anyone. Form and function combined. Which is why I say the ideal gift would be something they need AND want.

And... that about sums it up, actually. Anything obvious I missed? It's certainly possible, it's 12:30 here and it's been a long Christmas. Even if it is Boxing Day now. There's your unattainable Platonic Ideal of a Gift though, for what little bearing Platonic Ideals have on the actual real messy world.

Comments

[the-s-guy.livejournal.com]

In the 'need, want, but wouldn't buy for themselves' category, both my brother and I had book-based wishlists which included items we thought relatively unobtainable. His were rare and pre-ISBN, mine were unlikely to be found in the country or shippable in less than six weeks.

I found my brother the last unsold copy in the country of the item he wanted, and added a couple of first editions by the same author as a bonus. My Dad located a handful of the books I wanted in the country next door, with same-week shipping.

Both were a pleasant surprise, moreso because we'd mentally written them off as likely gifts, despite them being on our wishlists. So, apart from having actually heard of them, they were pretty close to our Platonic ideals.

[h371x.livejournal.com]

Of worth to think about in your theory of the platonic gift, one must also keep in mind whom one is gifting for. I have found that over the years of living in increasingly frightening levels of poverty that now that I don't have the ability to buy anything for myself, I would much rather that people just buy me the things that I ask for (as they are usually things that I really wish I had) rather than get creative and look for that thing that will make me go "wow!".

- h3l!X