Wants

[forsyth]

There's many things I want to do. I want to write interesting and entertaining things, I want to dispense wisdom, I want to be comfortable and loved and all sorts of other things. I've missed out on some of these, squandered opportunities, ignored chances, and so on. The key, I'm realizing, is to just do things. Be active, not just reacting to life. Even if things don't work out perfectly, you'll usually learn more than you would have if you didn't. And that gives you more to go on for next time. Especially in writing, and wisdom, both of which come from what you've done. You can take wisdom from others, but it doesn't really fit you right until you make it part of yourself. Like a pair of new shoes, it's not really yours until you've broken them in, stomped a few miles in them.

If I'm going to write, then firstly, I have to actually write. And secondly, I have to do things, to have stuff to write about. Great as imagination and research are, experience gives things immediacy. And then maybe my journal will quit being so boring. Heh.

This isn't really any new revelation, things have been moving this way for a while. I barely watch TV any more, that was one of the first casualties of the Internet for me. And lately I've been moving away from having music on most of the time online, too. Constant stimulation keeps giving you new input, even if it's something you've heard a thousand times before. Which can be helpful, or it can be noise. Sometimes, you need the quiet and time to think to let things settle and fall into place.

That and general distractions and things like work and life are part of the reason I've not been on IRC or the GG forums as much, or on Furc. I just haven't been able to be involved like I used to be, haven't been able to keep up. And I'm trying to cut back on the amount of time I spend gaming, to make it a hobby again, rather than a constant thing. The problem is, it means I don't see many people as much as I'd like to, and that's bad. Even the ones here on LJ, where I just hook my brain to the keyboard and let crap pour out.

But, I've started the new job hunt, and it's time for things to start changing. They shoulda a long while ago, but what's done is done, let's see where this goes.

Tags: Mindscribbles, Me

Comments

[kalifla.livejournal.com]

And once again I'm just fascinated to be privy to your journal...

[forsythferret.livejournal.com]

What's so facinating about my journal?

[kalifla.livejournal.com]

First off, the quality of writing. It's been a VERY long time since I've read anything expressed so fully, online or off. Secondly, you're very informed about the opinions you tend to express here. That's impressive to me, since I never bother learning anything that could form opinions that other people would get annoyed with. I may not always be able to agree with what you post, but when I do the most I can say is a hearty "right on!" and things like that. I have no room to argue, because I know you know more about the subject than I do.

So you're teaching me, whether you meant to or not.

[forsythferret.livejournal.com]

Psh, Kal, you can always argue with me, that's part of the point. There's no better way to test theories than defending them or trying them. So if you disagree, go right ahead!

And thanks for the compliments, though I think you're giving me too much credit, most of this is just consolidating ideas I've stolen from elsewhere. :)

[kalifla.livejournal.com]

I've found early on that arguing with no real facts to help support it is pointlessly and quickly lost to the opponent.

And trust me, I know you're consolidating ideas. That's the whole point. Plagiarism is stealing an entire idea from one source. Research is stealing several concepts from lots of sources and combining it into a new whole, a different take (possibly) on the subject. I'm not giving you too much credit because from what I've read, you give them credit.

As far as my own disagreements, I've got issues with that. It's another self esteem thing that I shan't get into here. :) Just believe that you wouldn't be the only person I'd avoid disagreeing with.