[personal profile] forsyth
If you're ever telling your child something at all similar to how they're the greatest disappointment in your life, you're doing it wrong.

You're not trying to "challenge" them, it's not "tough love", you're just hurting them, and possibly setting up a dramatic battle where they repudiate you and all that you stood for, rather than trying to meet your expectations. Possibly in a thunderstorm.

Also, it's not your job. Your job is to help them, train them, and encourage them to go out and kick the world's butt, then get out of the way and let them do it their way, and offer help when they need it.

But then again, I don't have kids yet, so I could be completely wrong. But I don't think so.
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Forsyth

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